I am being pulled in 4,398 different directions. Normally, I'd be going batshit crazy at this point. However, I'm actually loving it, because I was essentially "off the grid" for about 3 weeks whilst I physically and emotionally dealt with life's most recent curveball. I'm making up for lost time I suppose.
Even though I'm definitely on overload, I feel this strange sense of calm. I just dealt with pretty much the worst thing that I've ever had to go through in my life, and I came out of it stronger and more confident in myself and my life.
Sometimes it takes a tragedy to realize what is really important.
Sometimes, you need to go through something ugly before you can see how beautiful things really are.
Sometimes, you have to stop complaining about how difficult life is, and realize that you could lose it all in the blink of an eye.
With the knowledge that I've gained over the past few weeks, I've also been hugging a little tighter. Calling more often.
Laughing. Laughing a lot.
This picture was taken when My Gazelle and I had just started dating. We were fresh, our relationship was unscathed, and we were drunk. Often. We were living it up. We had no responsibilities to each other or to our two dogs and a bird. We didn't have plumbing fixtures lying all over the kitchen floor.
We didn't have dishes waiting to be washed in the bathroom sink. We weren't aware when this picture was taken that we'd even still be together four years later, much less still be together and charging through our first life tragedy together.
He still makes me laugh like this.
I don't wish what we've just gone through on my worst enemy. However, I can honestly say that the strength with which we coped with this situation has made an already confident decision completely concrete.
I'm marrying my best friend in 9 days, and it's the best decision that I've ever made.